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The woes of Facebook
It is an unfair world that we live in: when effort in a relationship doesn’t equate to success; where the nice person is stamped on like a welcome mat; where the innocent and the loving are intensely and explicitly humiliated. And most depressing of all, how these unfortunate society’s truths are accentuated Facebook- the mother of social media and perhaps the most personal.
Thus it seems fitting that Facebook should come with the tragic tagline (and what I believe to be the truth) ‘Destroying Relationships since 2004’. Certainly on a personal level I have felt the strong relationships that I once had disintegrate and the pain and humiliation surrounding it all, to be heightened by Facebook.
The moment when you hover your cursor with your quivering hand over the un-friend button and find the strength to click is something that all Facebook users have experienced. Once the moment when you press that mouse, an instant sense of relief washes all over you for you are no longer plagued with the woes of whether to friend or un-friend. Thus it is tempting and comforting to think that person has disappeared into the epic jungle that is cyberspace and that you will never see them again.
You still have mutual friends, Facebook suggests that you should re-add them again and you still have pictures that you’re both tagged in, uploaded for the entire world to see in their hideous glory. Realising this icy aspect of human relationship Facebook has invented the ‘block’ feature to ensure complete severance of contact of those who you wish to never see again.
For some this is the perfect way to evade trolls, to get rid of the stalker fascinated by your cleavage in your profile picture or to stop an overbearing parent. But for the more discerning this seems a poor compensation for the social media that serves as an extension of dysfunctional relationship.
From my experience, Facebook is nothing more than a platform for the more destructive elements of personality. Too often I have been regarded as the embarrassment in various social circles, so that being associated with me is a form of an embarrassment. Take for example a diminutive, deformed, drag queen who didn’t want to be associated with me that she just spoke to me through the chat feature and took to status to talk about how ugly I was. Or for another example, there was a tank of a Biochemist student who would take control of her boyfriend’s page to hound me with unwarranted harassing pictures, spamming posts and unsolicited pokes.
Another hilarious example of annoyance on Facebook is that it emphasises the overinflated ego of the miscreants. Nothing more than the extraordinarily turgid, then mid-twenties, medic wannabe (but looked ten years older), university drop out, who decided to overwhelm everyone’s home feed with pointless updates and likes that would make one to block living daylights out of him. He could not stand anyone (especially me) other than his small group of tightly knit friends and it was clear that social media more than fuelled his self-indulgent vanity.
But the biggest complaint is that it more than highlights the sadistic nature of Facebook users: those who seek humiliation of those others for almost a sexual pleasure. Somehow I have found an unusual affinity with them for I can understand that those are the ones who have been damaged by the toxic relationships that they are still smarting from and who feel compelled to behave in this manner. For when everyone is annoying, when personal faults are amplified through Facebook and when most of all, relationships are disintegrating, who couldn’t resist a modicum of bullying to ensure they get their comeuppance?
By the way please like my Facebook Page
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